B’ Mitzvah
(Bar/Bat/Bet Mitzvah)

In Progressive Judaism, a young person celebrates their journey towards Jewish adulthood when they reach the age of 13. Supported by their family and community, they will usually undertake a course of preparation and then mark and celebrate this moment publicly. Some people also choose to celebrate in this way as an adult.

This rite is referred to in different ways in our communities. Some use the language of Bar and Bat Mitzvah for boys and girls (in the plural B’nei and B’not Mitzvah). Others use non-gendered terminology such as Bet or Brit Mitzvah. In this article, we use the singular B’ Mitzvah to include all of these celebrations.

The marking of B’ Mitzvah is an exciting moment celebrating a young person’s growth and development after a period of learning and reflection.

It is a time in which they consider deeply what it means to be responsible for their Jewish life. Such responsibilities include being an active participant in synagogue life, the local Jewish community and wider society.

Progressive Judaism emphasises taking this journey, when possible, as part of a group; learning with peers and building life-long friendships.

At 13, a young person reaches a level of dependability where their family and friends know they can count on them for support; where the community knows that they will show up and be counted. Just as important is the ability to make good and kind choices in our relationships with others.

Hand-in-hand with the responsibilities expected of one who has reached B’ Mitzvah are also certain rights and privileges. Such rights include leading the community in prayer, teaching the congregation and publicly reading from the Torah.

Many families chose to mark the occasion with the community. There are many different ways of marking B’ Mitzvah in a Progressive Jewish community and these can include:

• Publicly reading or chanting from a Torah scroll as part of a service.
• Being called up to recite a blessing before and after the Torah is publicly read (known as an aliyah).
• Sharing something learnt about Torah with the congregation (often called a d’var Torah or sermon).
• Leading part of a service, either alone or alongside the rabbi or cantor.
• Undertaking a charitable project to raise funds or awareness about an important cause.
• Creating a special liturgy or siddur for a service.

B’ Mitzvah is an important moment for both the young person and their family. We welcome and include parents, siblings and relatives, from both Jewish and non-Jewish backgrounds, in our communal celebrations.

As important as the day on which we mark a child’s B’ Mitzvah is, it is the journey towards this date that really matters.

Many synagogues run their own courses of preparation for B’ Mitzvah and The Movement for Progressive Judaism runs a national programme called Kivunim. These courses help young people to deepen their connection and knowledge with Judaism through friendship, fun activities and thought-provoking activities.

B’ Mitzvah is usually marked at 13 in Progressive Judaism (irrespective of gender). However, sometimes postponing this by months, or even years, will be in the best interest of the child. Every person is unique and there may also be other appropriate ways to mark a B’ Mitzvah. We welcome those with special educational needs and families that may require additional support.

Jewish education doesn’t end at B’ Mitzvah. Many communities have the custom of Kabbalat Torah, a group ceremony to mark two further years of Jewish study.

Adult B’ Mitzvah

Those who never had a B’ Mitzvah, for any reason, often choose to do so in adulthood, whatever their age. Our Progressive communities across the country welcome and support adults in preparing for and celebrating their B’ Mitzvah.

Some people also like to celebrate a significant anniversary of their original B’ Mitzvah and/or the reaching of a milestone by repeating their portion when, for instance, they reach 53 or 83 or 100.

To find out more about B’ Mitzvah, your local community’s rabbi, cantor or lay leader should be your first point of contact. They will be able to offer you guidance and advice as you approach this special moment.